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Oh... Amelio

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[04 Mar 2007|03:26pm]
ah boy, only 17 more days until spring is officially here. the sun is shinning at least today, the cold doesn't feel so bitter.

so this entire week since last sunday i've been indoors and out of school (and cut off from the outside world) due to a. the whooping cough & b. a relapse in mono. i was the sickest i've been in years and years and it sucked. although, it was sort of nice to relax and not have to worry about anything going on besides the insides of my own body. i retreated to my grandmas and got pampered while watching to much cable tv, movies, and the history of heavy metal. i go back to school tomorrow, which is ok because i'm restless and need to be back into things. i gotta take it easy though, even though there are now plenty of people and things i want to do. robby and i need to go on our date to the olive garden. i need to take oso for a walk with good people who will stand strong (although cold) after being soaking wet from lake michigan. i have to get my brand new ticket, the falls and kevin are calling my name (and justin's empty house too)... etc etc you get the picture. most importantly i want to see brittany, who's now sick probably with the whooping cough also. oh god.

i cant wait for summer, and freedom, and the oppritunity for travel. come spring break i'll be in vancouver, british columbia hopefully falling in love with the culture and region with a few of my friends. thats something to look forward to. last night i had one of the best dreams of my life. it ended with me cruising around on a skateboard in some sunny area with a few random hot boys. it was nice.

the other day my mom walks into the bathroom and tells me i stink, while i'm in the shower. of course i answer with "i dont care" she then proceeds to ask me, "when are you going to date a boy who's not a "dirty stinky rock n rollin skateboarder"". oh mom, i wish i had an answer for you. i cant help it. why am i attracted to the dirty nasties?

i'm feeling ok about life right now, things are truckin along. i've had more thrown at me in the last 4 months then i've ever had before, but hey i've delt and shiiiiiit look at me now. oh and i took advantage of this week and decided to try and quit smoking. so i haven't smoked a cigarette in exactly a week. and i'm going crazy already. it was a lot easier when there was no possible way i could have obtained any smoke in my lungs without dying. now i'm itching, hopefully i can battle it out.
this entire thing was so random. be good, kids.
oh yea and we got the Wii, fuck yea.

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[25 Jan 2007|10:20pm]
i'm in the middle of a huge wake up call, with all of everything everything everything.
oh goodness
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gotta stay busy when your head can drive you crazy [06 Jan 2007|01:53pm]
i found a dandelion before the sun was awake this morning. it was ment for me, i know it. imagine, a little lone dandelion tilting towards the lake in the middle of winter - just the thing i needed. it's getting better and better every day.
so i haven't recapped my life on this thing in a long long time, but i'm so happy right now it's worth it. my brain can't function the way it should, so here's to joe summing it all up!:

"THE SHOW....
started as literly the wierdest thing in the whole world!
but it turned amazing.
minus the grease lightning looking dude that did them drums

afterwards at justins was awesome!
we all crunks, and then the idea of a bath jumps into our head!
THEN SHOWER!
THEN TEMPRAPETIC MATTRESS SLEEP OVER!!!!
we all crashed at around 3:30 and were all awake by 7 in the morning!!!!

so its 7 in the morning and we are thinking of what to do
what better then smoke birthday bowls and orange juice and vodka

SO WE GO TO THIS AMAZING CLIFF TO LOOK OUT OVER THE LAKE AND SUN
THEN AMELIA'S AMAZING ASS CALLED UP MC.D'S CHUMP ASS AND GOT US FREE BREAKFAST!!!!!!

NOW IM ABOUT TO PIERCE MY EAR TO COMPLIMENT MY BRAID!!!

HAHAHAHA

HAPPY BIRTHDAY JUSTIN ROSS!!!!!"

great great night great friends great fun, and i really feel great about waking up so early today, we got so much done and had a blast doing it. ITS TRUE i pierced justin and joe's ears early today. they look rad of course, especially with the saftey pin earring they're both currently sporting. i dont know what could make things much better right now, except having lauren colin and amanda home! tonight is the continuation of justins birthday fun, so if anyones down come give me a call and come hang. just love life dudes, it's all worth it if you can find it in you to give yourself up to it.

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[28 Dec 2006|06:02pm]
man i am just so lonely and bored. hit me up dudes for real, i miss everyone.
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[24 Sep 2006|11:57am]
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Although simple, last night was somewhat refreshing. Bud Matt and Sarah's is my oasis. Jackass 2 was fucking funny and the people who surrounded me at the theater and mostly afterwards gave me a sigh of relief that shit, things can still be cool sometimes. I guess everyone isn't as inhumane as i was starting to think they were. When i say last year around this time was the best time of my life, i mean it directed to the nights and parties and the lives we were part of at the Party Awesome house. Things felt really, really good then. I had faith in something, although i still dont know what that was. But i felt positive awesome energy and passion for something above seeing which one of us could throw ourselves down the porch the hardest or get the most punches in in a boxing match. I hope we can reclaim that energy and find positivity and awesome drunks in eachother again this winter. I do know how to fucking ramble, it's Sunday, I go to school tomorrow. FUCK!
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[23 Sep 2006|10:07am]
i dont remember the last time i felt truely content. i dont remember the last time we were all happy together. i miss my friends and i miss when everyone got a long and all i want right now is for everyone to come home and screw college and have things be like they used to. the happiest time of my life was about this time last year, and i want to get back to it. but at least i can think of this cute cat that lived in the natural food store in baltimore when im feeling down:
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[26 Aug 2006|11:09am]
well i'm home from my travels. we left monday morning and 11 hours later, we arrived in our first destination: pittsburgh. tuesday night we went exploring and hung out and learned at the info shop in a sort of "ghetto" of pittsburgh. that night was filled with awesome fun, expensive wine and pbr, and greasy ass food. we all decided pittsburgh was good to us and we cant wait to go back. wensday morning we all woke up with a hangover hardly ready to drive to baltimore.
being back in baltimore was amazing for both steph and i, it felt as though we had never left it. thursday was another day of exploring and visiting familiar places that steph and i had missed. thursday was another day filled with party party party and we got to see many of the people we missed from pre-college. the night ended with britt and i walking back to her new dorm room, and sharing a single bed for our full 3 hours of sleep that night.
the mini van we drove out with contained 5 GIRLS at start, and friday morning we left with 4. i'm going to miss brittny a whole whole lot. i'm going to miss grey sam and matt and all the other students we had become close with who go to mica. i'm going to miss casey and alyssa and beez and jeff and everyone else who's leaving us behind in milwaukee!
steph and i have a sort of plans for travel, anyone who wants to go out and visit let me know we'll hook it up.
it's saturday me last weekend day of summer! call call call me.
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[20 Jul 2006|11:00pm]
tomorrow is our last day of class and afterwards we have our gallery show, graduation and big ass dance party. i'll be pulling my 3rd all nighter this week due to deadlines. i have to say collectively this has been one of the most amazing yet stressful months of my life. i cant believe this shits over, it's gone so fucking fast. i know i'll miss it here. i'll miss our room, micas amazing campus, our tarcs. i'll miss our classes, the vegan food, our trips off campus to eat at amazing resturants. i'll miss the people here and sitting on the big ass hill they had to block off because the grass was falling out. i'll miss the steady flow of people in and our of our place, our chill spot with all our brothas on the picnic bench, and all the peaches i've been eating. i'll miss the smoke sessions in our bathrooms, the togetherness of all of us here, and the constant play of people outside. i think i'll miss everything besides the stressful deadlines and the constant work. but most most most i'll miss my fucking roommate. i'll be home early sunday dudes be ready for me.


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[02 Jul 2006|12:32pm]
my mom's sending me my camera adaptor in a few days, i'll have pictures up then.
baltimore is fucking crazy and mica is a huge challenge.
while i'm having an amazing time, i'm more homesick now then i ever have been. i never realized how amazing miltown is. i'll see you guys soon.
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[22 Jun 2006|12:56am]
love love love you guys, see you in a fucking month!
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[03 Jun 2006|12:19am]
Tried going to a Brewer's game tonight. Tickets were more then expected, We failed.
Ended up at Texas Holdem's or Steakhouse or whatever the fuck it's called
Where they have barrels of peanuts and you just stick your hand in there and grab em, and then spit the remains on the floor or in a bucket.
Obsence, classic!
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[29 May 2006|02:26pm]
Memorial Day
This morning i woke up and went to my uncle eddy's gravestone with a few of my family members
There is a brand new section of stones since the last time i've been there
mostly from Iraq. It gave me a sick and sad feeling in my stomach
There was a lady with dark leathery skin sitting in front of one of those stones smoking a cigarette and crying. I felt just as sad for her
My grandpa gave me a brand new hankie for my tears which i cant seem to control these days
They just spill out
I gave her cups filled of dandelions just about everytime i was over. The dandelions are gone now and so are the spirit that made them so special to me
This past week has been absolutely insane and probably the most heart breaking
I'm happy the weather has been nice, things would have been worse without it
sleep overs at jakes - backyard fires - so much late and empty homework - two amazingly sad days filled with a family i feel that i'm part of - amazing friends - drunk drunk drunks - the most ridiculous jokes - sun burned shoulders - fishing - dirty finger and toe nails dirty clothes dirty hair dirty pits dirty skin hairy legs - extreme moods
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[24 May 2006|03:18pm]
Appreciate and love all who are around you, keep them close
Let them know how much you care care care

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Also, if anyone needs clarification or just needs to talk, i'm here.
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[09 May 2006|05:47pm]
Come see Me Britt and Alyssa's installation piece at the Hagerty Museum tomorrow! It starts at 7; contact one of us if your interested. The theme is (more or less) the lack of truth in the media's portrayal of the war in Iraq. I hope all goes well and after this i can finally get some sleep and a break from Brittny (about 5 consecutive days of sleepovers)!!! Hope to see you guys tomorrow!

p.s. just jokin ya britt
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[07 May 2006|07:02pm]
my room is illuminated with sunlight,
and i'm happy


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[24 Apr 2006|10:00pm]
YEAAAA MICA PRE-COLLEGE! I GOT ACCEPTED!


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I'm so stoaked and crazy feeling about it. This means i'm going to be gone for a month in the middle of summer. This means i'm going to miss many birthdays. And exciting events. But it also means i'm going to have the fucking time of my life doing something i really love to do.
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[23 Apr 2006|03:09pm]
How does time so easily slip away?
that really gets to me, every day runs away faster then the last
i'm over loaded and stressed with homework
nonetheless this break was real good to me, and so were all the friends involved in it
It's spring! spring! spring!, next is summer!


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:edit:: i'm going to miss lil buddy and bob so so so much
this is seriously just to sad
and i hate it

so now what do we do?
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[11 Apr 2006|07:55pm]
i've been thinking about you....

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[04 Apr 2006|08:17pm]
I'm going to cry if Steph and I get into MICA
I'm going to cry if Steph and I don't get into MICA
I'm going to cry cry cry cry either way!
And I'm going to cry some more when Grey and Matt go back to MICA and
ESPECIALLY if they take Brittny with them
Everyone just hope that Steph and I get into MICA for pre-college
EEECK!

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::edit: right now i swear i love my friends more then anything ever in the entire world, bridget especially. this love aint stoppin for nothin...
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[21 Mar 2006|09:28pm]
Random, you might not want to try to make sense of all of this:
Hmph
My body is drained and exhausted
It's the hardest thing
seeing someone you really care about
become so helpless
theres virtually nothing i can do
TALK about virtues
Do i even have any anymore?
I miss people
but hardly
Things dont seem to work the same anymore
my dreams have even changed
into some strange setting
anarchist cheating dinner: is what they are made of
i'm a stranger to good friends
a best friend
i feel distant
i cant say im ok with that
but it's something i feel i need to do right now
by myself
or almost
I have become more politically aware and wondering
my brain doesn't fit
and doesnt sit right
and i dont know how much longer i can keep doing this
coming and going
ditching and ignoring
digging myself into unnessary graves
being forced to think its "myfault"
disappointing my parents
disappointing myself
i'm happy
really i am
but theres always something missing
maybe not always, but most of the time
saturday so was damn fulfilling
and i dont want to stop
writing
or learning
or.... something else of the sort.

Im a weirdo, iknow that for sure
I've felt a FUCK load of love for people lately
A lot more then i've felt in a long time
But part of my self is missing
and i dont know what im thinking
and, fuck ok im done


::edit: after rereading this, it sounds as though i'm depressed or something
i'm not even close, i am extremely actually happy
but ive also felt really stressed and unsatisfied lately
i dont know if its possible, but ive been feeling 2 extreme feelings at the exact same time, all the time
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